A Whole Lot of Coffee & a Few Thoughts

For those who don't know, this past Spring, I got a tattoo on my foot that says "Proverbs 16:9"...within a week, the tattoo had faded but the tattoo artist said that since it was on the foot(the spot most likely to fade) that he would redo it for free.... That was almost 8 months ago. It has now faded to the point where its pretty unreadable but for reason I just never found the time to get it redone. If you have seen my last blog post or have been around me these past couple months, you would have noticed that I havent really been myself. I went through a dark spot of my life but through it God taught me some things that I would have never learned without going through that. Although I am out of that rough patch, one of the things that I think about and get anxious about on a daily basis is my future. Any senior in college can attest to the anxiety and pressures of determining one's future plans and finding jobs. I wasn't prepared for it at all and around the...

"A lot of people don't realize that depression is an illness. I don't wish it on anyone, but if they would know how it feels, I swear they would think twice before they just shrug it."                                                                                                              -Johnathan Davis Well, as you can probably tell this post is something that I've struggled with my whole life:  Depression I couldn't tell you when or why its something I deal, but the fact is...I do. This is the first time I've publicly stated it. Im not asking for responses or "cheer ups", its just something I gotta get off my chest.    Looking back on my life I could probably point out reaso...

“Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection.  When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone accuses me or criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, "Well, that proves once again that I am a nobody." My dark side says, I am no good... I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned.  Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the "Beloved."    Being the Beloved constitute...

I don't know if you actually watched this video or not, but if you didn't, please do. It's a song that talks about one of the many problems in Christianity today. The lyrics that describe this song the best is this: Jesus, friend of sinners, the one who's writing in the sand Made the righteous turn away and the stones fall from their hands Help us to remember we are all the least of these Let the memory of Your mercy bring Your people to their knees Nobody knows what we're for only what we're against when we judge the wounded What if we put down our signs crossed over the lines and loved like You did I'll be the first to admit, I don't like the term "Christian", I prefer "Christ Follower". In today's world, being "Christian" means being "holier than thou", at least to those who aren't involved in the Christian religion. You see after generations of focusing on the sins of others and...

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine here in Charleston, who over the past six months has become like a brother to me, experienced tragedy when he lost his mother. Because God blessed me so much and allowed our lives to cross, I felt pain and experienced the hurt for him as he and his family began to grieve their loss. But then I realized, I don't know what to do or say. I can only tell him 'Im praying for him" or  I love him so many times. He knows both of those things. He knows that I will always be here for him no matter, so I didn't want to say another cliche thing. So I did what I know what to do best, write. This poem is dedicated to him and his family. Though he's mourning and hurting, I know he is strong. I know that his relationship with Christ is what will allow him to continue on. As he does continue on, I will be there each step of the way. This one is for you JK, love you brother... It usually hits around the time I'm getting into bed, ...

To the best Grandmother a boy could ever ask for,      You know that poem on the side of your fridge? The one I wrote when I was younger and it talks about how I'll love you forever...that poem has been in my head since I heard the news of your lung cancer. I keep asking God why this is happening to you, why is this happening to our family? I know cancer is out there and I know it happens to other people, but when it hit this close to home, my world came crashing down. Small Cell Carcinoma? I remember asking myself what that was and googling everything I could about it. For my sake, I probably would've been better if I hadn't of looked into it.      When I talked to you on the phone the other day, you reminded me that I need to remember the good memories we've had together. You assured me that no matter what happens, you will be alright. You don't know how much I've needed to hear that. Although it hurts to think about a time when you're not here, k...

So this Christmas break has been a rollercoaster. I just returned from China, but can't talk about that because theres probably someone from the Chinese government reading this right now.( If you are reading this from China, just know that Jesus loves you!) So if you want to know about that, then ask me in person! Anyways, so I returned from my trip and went immediately to Passion 2012 in Atlanta. Between jetlag and a cold, I must admit I haven't gone to every session or community group but God knew which ones I would be at because everything I have gone to, He has rocked my world. Today's morning session in particular was extremely life changing. After running into my old math teacher here at Passion(Go read my blog "Everyone needs their own Susan Jones", God began to speak to me. He reminded me that I am linked to my failures, but to Him. If it wasn't for Him blessing me through Susan Jones, I wouldn't be who I am today. So at today's mornin...